Hormone Changes Caused My Anxiety
For a while my life looked ordinary. I was a married mom juggling the usual load of work and family. One spring I decided to get a long-term birth-control device so I could stop thinking about a daily pill. What I did not expect was how it would scramble my hormones. The shift hit my mental state hard, and out of nowhere I started feeling fear, dread, and a sick sort of physical unease.
Summers I usually went part-time. Fewer hours meant more rest, and more rest meant less pressure on me. When autumn came and I returned to my full schedule, the worry arrived in sudden bursts. Each one passed quickly, but I could tell something was off. I became fixated on protecting my family from a danger I couldn't even name, and the fact that I knew the fear made no sense only wound me tighter.
Then my husband came down with a stomach bug. I was so frightened for him that my own stomach turned, and after this kept happening I finally went to my doctor.
She told me I had Generalized Anxiety Disorder, GAD for short. I started medication, began therapy, and leaned on my mother for support. Being alone was the worst. Fear would flare up and I'd retreat to bed, half-convinced that if nothing changed I'd end up in a hospital. The feeling of having no power over any of it was crushing. I needed someone beside me at all times. Work was impossible, focus was gone. Somewhere in there I became sure the device was behind all of it.
Once that clicked, I had it taken out. Within a few days I noticed a difference, though I wasn't back to myself yet.
Every day still took effort. I kept moving through my routines and eventually went back to work after the sharpest stretch of anxiety had eased. During that period I started trying things to settle myself: craniosacral therapy, massage, music, breathing work, and meditations meant to pull my attention away from the stress and fear. From there I added yoga, journaling, and some Ayurvedic practices, all aimed at shifting how I felt and quieting the anxiety.
About a year after the GAD diagnosis, I felt steadier. A quiet worry stayed with me, though: what if someone got sick and the whole thing came rushing back? The test came when my son fell ill. No surge of panic arrived. The relief was enormous, like a weight I'd carried for months just slid off. I didn't have to be afraid of my own world or of the attacks anymore.
Looking back, I understand it now. The hormone changes had my brain insisting I was sick. Once the slow-release medication was out of my body and I'd built a yoga practice, I managed to shift both my body chemistry and my thinking. My mind came back to me, back in balance.
I feel much stronger these days. Letting go of the worry about worrying freed me to approach my relaxation practices from a steadier place instead of a frightened one. Yoga, meditation, breathing exercises, long walks, calming music, and journaling are all part of my weeks now. I've let go of a lot of the old negativity, and I rarely get as rattled as I once did.
-Anonymous Contributor